Frustration

WARNING: This is a rant, I repeat, this is a rant. And it may be a little TMI, especially if you are male. Proceed with caution. I am so frustrated. I am in pain today. I got my cycle back after 20 months or so with out it. I don't have any pain medication, so I called my gyn's office and requested something for the pain. The nurse called me back and our conversation went a little something like this:
Nurse: "You probably just are having cramps because of your cycle."
NO CRAP SHERLOCK! Ok, sorry I know that wasn't very nice at all. No worries, I didn't say that out loud.
Me: "I'm sure that is the problem, but my pain is very bad with my cycle because of my endometriosis."
Nurse: "I'll talk to him about it, what do you usually take?"
Well, here's the part where I feel like a really druggy.
Me: "Um vicodin, or loratab, or any other hydrocodone drug, but I usually just need it the first few days."
Nurse: "ok, I'll see what he says." Click!

Now, she just called me back. Here's how that went.
Nurse: "Um, Molly... have you ever tried anaprox."
Me: "No, what is that?"
Nurse: "It is a medicine they use for the pain and menstrual cramps"
Really, I hadn't figured that out yet. Again, sorry, it is the hormones talking.
Me: Well, is it naproxen?
Nurse: I think it is two or three different things, all for the cramps.
Me: Ok, I'll give it a try
Nurse: He doesn't want you to have the darvocet, but if your pain gets really bad, give me a call and I will call it in, but it will only be for #30 with no refills.
Me: (starting to get irritated, who am I kidding, I'm way past irritated) Ok, I have tried a lot of different things. I've had horrible pain for as long as I can remember. Click!

So, first off, darvocet isn't what I asked for anyway. It gives me a terrible headache and I hate the stuff. I'd rather be in pain, then in pain and have a headache from the meds. Also, I googled anaprox and it is just rx strength naproxen aka alieve. Doubtful that it will help, but whatever. I have tried so many drugs. They put me on celebrex when I was 16! Yeah, the one that may have caused heart attacks. Honestly, I couldn't even tell you what all I've tried. I AM NOT AN ADDICT! Or, maybe I am, and that's why I had 3 surgeries in 3 years, for the drugs. NO, wait, it's because I have endometriosis all over my reproductive organs and bladder. That's it, that is why I did it. I am defiantly NOT and addict. I am really wondering if he looked at my chart. Doesn't he remember me? The one who by age 20 had 3 laps. The one who couldn't conceive on my own even though I was young. The one who took lupron for 11 months. I mean, if I was an addict, I would have skipped the medically induced menopause and stuck with the drugs for the pain.

The problem is, I received really great care for the 2 years prior to getting pregnant. I went to a dr who knows this disease. I went to a dr who hated that my life was consumed with pain. I went to a dr that didn't want to see my marriage suffer because of this disease. I went to a dr who wanted us to have a baby. I'm not saying for a moment that my current dr wants those things for me, but I'm just not sure he knows me or this disease. He was a wonderful ob, and exceeded all my expectations when it came to my pregnancy. Maybe he is too busy with the ob part of his practice to treat me. I don't know. I just don't ever want to be treated like an addict. Now I'll leave you with a quote.
"I don't have a problem with pain medication, I have a problem with pain" -Dr. House
Oh, wait, he is an addict. HA!